Come on girls!!!
Females over the age of 12!!!!
Why can’t we finally get it?
Stop chasing guys!
Yes, our society is all about empowering girls and women! To take charge and go for what you want. Maybe so, but in the real world of guys, it hurts you. When you “take charge” and go full force for the hot guy you want, it can lead to you lowering your standards (acting a fool) and behaving in ways that make you feel horrible about yourself. You will quickly be known as “that girl” in the guy’s circle of friends.
Over the last 30 years, I have spoken with hundreds of guys of all ages in my office as well as my many times around my own block. When it comes to the basics of guys, not much changes. Chasing, being pushy, constantly texting (any social media), calling, asking “what are we?” questions, and being too available, gets old quickly and makes them want to “ghost you” or run the opposite way.
Upon conception, the seed of competition, desire to chase, and craving to win is planted in the male soul. Guys love the chase as well as the competition….and will do just about anything to win.
If a guy is interested in you – he will let it be known. A guy worth having will rise to the challenge. He’ll figure out quickly how to improve his chances with you and find ways to spend time together. It might take him awhile, but he will rise to the occasion in time.
This doesn’t mean you can’t flirt, smile, be friendly, make eye contact, converse, hang out, attend a party he will be attending, or walk by him and his friends and say, “HI”. If he sends you a text, “like” or “snap”, respond, but do not make him “your guy” and the center of your thoughts and universe. Most importantly, do not put yourself in any situation where you may become horizontal with a guy too soon!
Guys want to impress girls. Many times, girls don’t let them. Don’t make things easy for him. Let a guy pursue you and come up with the plans to do so. He will, if he is the kind of guy you are looking for.
Chasing (and other things done with your body) will capture a guy’s attention, but if you are interested in something more, don’t do it! This leads to the age-old behavior of beating yourself up the “next day”. Girls already have enough self-criticism going without adding this to your list! Going to your best friend and asking for advice after your stupid choices, doesn’t do much good either because most of our friends tell us what we want to hear…
The way you begin a relationship with a guy sets the tone for the duration of the relationship. Fulfilling all his needs and desires – doing all the work will be expected. This continues until he finds the girl of his dreams, and you are left resenting him for being “so selfish” and “not into” you.
When I was a teenager, my dad used to say, “Morals and rules with guys don’t change”. Of course, my dad was “too old, stupid, and just didn’t understand me” ….
Interesting – he was right all along.
Girls: Too much too soon can destroy what might have been something amazing!
Chase your own dreams and passions – don’t chase a guy!!!!!
You will experience the feeling of achievement and success that no guy can ever offer you!